Santa Paws STEALING toys!??!

It seems like just making toys in his workshop and giving them to happy children on Christmas Day isn't making Santa happy anymore. Now he's out to steal the presents underneath the trees and keep them all to himself. I imagine he's basically turning into Smaug but instead of toys he's hoarding children's happiness.

Kids from all over the world have reported that Santa Paws hasn't waited until Christmas to get his grubby little hands on presents and is walking and coming down chimneys in broad daylight to take gifts before magically disappearing. We're pretty sure it isn't just the children lying about stealing the presents themselves because I mean, c'mon. They're angels. Also everyone here at Drama Llama is pretty sure that Santa Paws runs on children's tears. This is the only logical explanation.

Therefore if you see a Santa walking down your street, he's probably going to go steal some toys so you should give him a well-aimed punch to the face. Actually no, a nice handshake will suffice. We don't condone violence here. World peace 2013.

Anyways as everyone knows, the world's going to end tomorrow so we figured we'd get an issue out just to make everyone happy before the zombie apocalypse. Because the rapture will obviously include zombies, there is literally no other way for any other situation ever. Get your survival kits ready. See you on the other side. If we don't all perish in fire and flame, hopefully there will at least be something to write about!

Advice by Aardvark
If you would like your possible advice question featured in the next issue, shoot a PM to Shadestar!

Since we don't have any entries right now, I leave everyone with this.



Very Punny
Did you hear about the guy with his left side cut off? He's all right now.


My muse is literally as far below sea-level as is possible so I know this isn't on par with the other issue but sea urchins are people too.

Hehe good article. Also,i discovered. (When i went to Mexico,aka where the Aztec things were.) That its just a new age. You know like the Middle Ages. Ice age. See,its just a new era. Not the end of the world -.-

Hawkpool wrote:

Hehe good article. Also,i discovered. (When i went to Mexico,aka where the Aztec things were.) That its just a new age. You know like the Middle Ages. Ice age. See,its just a new era. Not the end of the world -.-

I do realize this

Really?
Beacuse to,me (not trying to be sassy here)
It seems everyone thinks its the end of the world.
I personally do not
But that's my opinion,and whats the date that says "the world will end," on?

Hawkpool wrote:

Really?
Beacuse to,me (not trying to be sassy here)
It seems everyone thinks its the end of the world.
I personally do not
But that's my opinion,and whats the date that says "the world will end," on?

That's what is completely hilarious about it. Most people know this now. And the mayan calendar ended on December 21st, 2012 so a lot of people just assumed that's when they predicted it it to be the end of the world. The history channel and a bunch of conspiracy theorists ran with it and terrified the world.

I mean they predicted the world to end on January 1st, 2000 but it didn't.

I just find it amusing. Most people know it's just the end of the mayan calendar and don't think the world is going to end. Lol. Guess we'll find out.

I'm going to laugh at all my friends tomorrow. They are all crazy and believe it will end! It's ridiculous!

True,it was just that stupid movie (i mean what it represents)
2012 i think it was called,it spread the rumors the world will end this year. Then the history channeles went to check it out
Oh look,there's a calendar that says the world will end in 2012 how couincedental
Then again they might or may not have read it correctly
After 21,
Oops,must have read it wrong.
Boom,the world cheers beacuse it won't end

Bluepup wrote:

True,it was just that stupid movie (i mean what it represents)
2012 i think it was called,it spread the rumors the world will end this year. Then the history channeles went to check it out
Oh look,there's a calendar that says the world will end in 2012 how couincedental
Then again they might or may not have read it correctly
After 21,
Oops,must have read it wrong.
Boom,the world cheers beacuse it won't end

Everyone thought it would end because the calendar ended on the 21st, that's the whole reason that started it xD

Not to mention if it were to end with the Mayan calender, we'd have 34ish more years. Mayans didn't count leap years

Hmm,that's acually something about the calendar i didn't know
Yet,i heard from a friend (at school 0.o) that the world would end in like...
2018 i think.

Note to self: examine the man in costume BEFORE you punch them in the face and kick.them in the stomache. (Igot into a LOOOT of trouble for that...)

Did you really?
Beacuse crazy kids will acually listen to what they see online...

I don't know why, but everyone thinks the world will end. I personally do not. I mean, why would the Myans just say, 'The world will end in 2012?'1 But, there is a good side, I make bets that the world won't end today, and I know I will win. So, all's good.

Bluepup wrote:

Did you really?
Beacuse crazy kids will acually listen to what they see online...

Lol. I did that before I saw this because he scared the gaboozles out of me. And apparently, it was my older brother. Lol

Hey, i'm alive. What about everyone else?

I think most people who say that the world is ending are just joking. A lot of people aren't actually taking it seriously.

On another note, Shade I know you say that this issue isn't as good as the last one but I loved it <3

ha. I saw that picture on ifunny. CUTEEEE.
also LOVELY EDITION.

I haven't seen the sun explode.
Also,I'm at a wedding :/
Would have been really bad if it were to
End right now
(The reason for the sun,is beacuse they thought that was how the world was going to end.)
And by wedding,i mean we'll be at the acual wedding in,i don't know 30 minutes?

Listen this articicle is not ment to be about the world ending. Look at the title. Gives you a clue. Doesn't it?

I LOVE this article xD here's a chart i made of how people are reacting to the "end-of-the-world"

2000 - everyone's freaking out
2001 - everyone's freaking out
2002 - everyone's freaking out
2003 - everyone's freaking out
2004 - everyone's freaking out
2005 - everyone's freaking out
2006 - everyone's freaking out
2007 - everyone's freaking out
2008 - everyone's freaking out
2009 - everyone's freaking out
2010 - everyone's freaking out
2011 - everyone's freaking out
2012 - no one cares anymore :3

The only thing i don't like about his issue is where it says, "How the hell do i get out?" because of our younger viewers.

Featherpaw wrote:

I LOVE this article xD here's a chart i made of how people are reacting to the "end-of-the-world"

2000 - everyone's freaking out
2001 - everyone's freaking out
2002 - everyone's freaking out
2003 - everyone's freaking out
2004 - everyone's freaking out
2005 - everyone's freaking out
2006 - everyone's freaking out
2007 - everyone's freaking out
2008 - everyone's freaking out
2009 - everyone's freaking out
2010 - everyone's freaking out
2011 - everyone's freaking out
2012 - no one cares anymore :3

The only thing i don't like about his issue is where it says, "How the hell do i get out?" because of our younger viewers.

Wow I have been so desensitized to swears I didn't even notice hahaha. I'll look around and see if I can find a more appropriate one.